Am I in love or am I drunk thinking of you?
I’m letting down the ones that build me up the most.
I’m all alone surrounded by all of my closest friends.
I won’t see them again till the summer
I bet against the fact that I could still love them.
I’m living now. Day by day. Drink by drink.
You’re living now and tomorrow forever.
See what I meant when I said I wasn’t the best
boy that you could have wasted your time with?
You wanted me and I thought of you naked.
I knew it was love because you took off your shirt.
You came alone to my state and you met all my friends.
And you took enough pills to fall asleep.
God, I was wrong.
God, I was wrong.
God, was I wrong about you.
You met my mom and I lied all about you.
How we met, your age, and how your brain worked.
We clearly loved one another just as long as the bottle
hidden inside of your purse was full.
At one point, I believed this was working.
I didn’t need to be near you at all.
I got to party with friends and keep open loose ends
while you overdosed in your best friends basement.
and I wouldn’t find out till the weekend.
when you’d tell me I was never
your boyfriend.
You’re better now. You’ve got a job and found some friends.
You’re better now. You got a man and got sober.
You’re better now. You’ve got it all that you ever wanted.
The things that I never would give you.
You haven’t touched a drink in a year now.
The thought of booze makes your stomach turn.
The smell of my breath turns you away.
I guess I’ll just drink.
credits
from shit so far,
released August 8, 2016
Written and Performed by Landon Maloney
Terry Venemous is releasing new music every 3 weeks this year. His latest EP is sumptuous art pop with a wry sense of detachment.
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